Dare I come back to this blog? I surely will fail to update it regularly once again. I have to sigh and admit though, that words are making me itchy, and the sole way to scratch is to let them out...so here we go.
Today is the first day of 8th grade for my daughter, and 5th for my son. I had a very near miss on a panic attack this morning around 4 a.m. as a result. My heart was racing and it felt like the ceiling was going to slowly lower onto me, and press me to the mattress like the world's least appealing panini. I breathed through it, and reasoned through it...and managed to push it away and fall asleep for another hour or so.
I laid there when I awoke again, and listened to the familiar sounds of my husband prepping for his workday. The shower, the toilet...the occasional blast of flatulence (sorry dearest). The pattern is comforting for all that it heralds that today Summer is REALLY over, and it is back to the potential emotional rollercoaster of "school". Now in a lot of households this is a day of happiness, expectation, or sadness and longing...here it has always been one of borderline terror.
Dramatic, yes. That doesn't make it any less true. One of those times when I just feel like if I do ANYTHING other than allow one day into my mind at once, I will straight up lose it and be dismantled completely, I mean stripped down from "I Got This", to a drooling idiot sucking her thumb in the corner (I really did used to suck my thumb as a kid, BTW...til I was close to 9.). One day at a time. Today I am going to get Eli and Lily to school...and things will not fall apart...today.
So. This year Lily is in 8th grade, last stop before she enters the whirling dervish of drama and "life choices" known as "High School In America"! I am not anticipating too much in the way of dire occurrences, she has a full load of Pre-AP classes, and Orchestra...she can handle those and if she needs help she will ask. I love that about her. My worries for her mainly hinge on my own ability to deal with her inevitable self-doubt and lack of motivation to do more than "decent".
Eli...well he is my bigger concern, and bad I feel for saying that, he is the one who's school year delivers me the most ulcer-worthy moments. I broke things down after this mornings weirdness. I am going to do three things: Contact the diagnostician about moving his ARD meeting to an earlier date. Contact his Resource Math teacher so I know he is still going there and won't get sucked into the vortex of long division and mixed number fractions before he is ready. Lastly? Renewing my own volunteer status so I can stalk, oops...help out wherever needed this year.
I have done all those things and now I am writing this out. This year is a big one. The STAAR looms even now, on the first day...in my mind. This is one of those years when not passing it absolutely does affect a kids ability to move on. A year that matters. He was no closer to passing it last year than he was the year before...so well. Yeah. Concerning. Part of the reason for moving the ARD was so we could get some answers about what will happen when he does not pass it this year, either. They completely removed the Modified option that kids in SpecED were to take...what they have replaced it with, I have no idea. Maybe they haven't replaced it with ANYTHING? That is a huge fear of mine. A fear so big I haven't even been able to bring myself to look on the website to check. I will. Just not today. Today I have the above to do...and I've done it. I also have to go and see him at lunchtime...just this once, just to see what he is like. Back on the Concerta, back in school. To eyeball the kids in his classroom...see if any are trouble, potential sources of unkindness or bullying for him. Make sure the teacher knows I am watching her kids just as much as she is. That I am involved and around...and accessible.
That is all, for today. Then later tonight after dinner probably...I'll start letting myself think about tomorrow. That is how I have to do things...so I don't get panini-ed.
Monday, August 25, 2014
Tuesday, December 18, 2012
2012 ARD Meeting
Yesterday was the ARD meeting. I believe it was the second one for the year as the first one was when we formally requested a re-assessment evaluation for an Autism Spectrum Dx addition to his IEP.
We had been given the findings report during the weekend so we'd gone over that and I had spoken with the school Psychologist as well since, so I knew we were getting the diagnosis added. Weight off my mind. Last time we tried was his first go around in 1st Grade and we were denied. Or rather, they found things...but not that were affecting him "academically"...therein is the rub!
This time tho, we all were in agreement. So we simply proceeded to the new accommodations for him. He also received a Speech addition now that he is older, it had become more evident that his prosody and pragmatics need help and there are a few letter sounds to work on as well. We absolutely agreed. The OT had some suggestions and findings as well relating to his fine motor...again, agreed.
In all we added quite a bit to his IEP. Speech twice a week, notes given on a sheet of paper at his desk vs only the overhead or board as transfer of information is rough for him. My husband and the Diagnostician also pushed for a calculator addendum to be put in..not necessarily for NOW, since math fact fluency is something he needs to get, and we are working on...but just to HAVE it there so its one less thing to fight for later on. We also added in frequent breaks during testing....small group testing vs entire class...and trascribing (he writes his answers on the test itself vs the scantron..which can be tough for him and cause additional anxiety). Some things about social interactions...lunch buddies, giving him jobs that are seen as important so his peers see him as important and competent, etc.
All in all we tried to lessen the level of anxiety he feels in class, prepare him for the inevitable testing, oral presentation, and social interactions that WILL be part of the higher elementary grades he is now part of. I think it went very well, and everyone present had nothing but nice things to say about him...how gentle he is and how sweet...how interested he is in pleasing the teachers. I know that to be true since he lives to play by the rules in general. But it is nice to hear!
Now we head out to conquer the rest of 3rd Grade and hope the things we enact help, and the results are good!
We had been given the findings report during the weekend so we'd gone over that and I had spoken with the school Psychologist as well since, so I knew we were getting the diagnosis added. Weight off my mind. Last time we tried was his first go around in 1st Grade and we were denied. Or rather, they found things...but not that were affecting him "academically"...therein is the rub!
This time tho, we all were in agreement. So we simply proceeded to the new accommodations for him. He also received a Speech addition now that he is older, it had become more evident that his prosody and pragmatics need help and there are a few letter sounds to work on as well. We absolutely agreed. The OT had some suggestions and findings as well relating to his fine motor...again, agreed.
In all we added quite a bit to his IEP. Speech twice a week, notes given on a sheet of paper at his desk vs only the overhead or board as transfer of information is rough for him. My husband and the Diagnostician also pushed for a calculator addendum to be put in..not necessarily for NOW, since math fact fluency is something he needs to get, and we are working on...but just to HAVE it there so its one less thing to fight for later on. We also added in frequent breaks during testing....small group testing vs entire class...and trascribing (he writes his answers on the test itself vs the scantron..which can be tough for him and cause additional anxiety). Some things about social interactions...lunch buddies, giving him jobs that are seen as important so his peers see him as important and competent, etc.
All in all we tried to lessen the level of anxiety he feels in class, prepare him for the inevitable testing, oral presentation, and social interactions that WILL be part of the higher elementary grades he is now part of. I think it went very well, and everyone present had nothing but nice things to say about him...how gentle he is and how sweet...how interested he is in pleasing the teachers. I know that to be true since he lives to play by the rules in general. But it is nice to hear!
Now we head out to conquer the rest of 3rd Grade and hope the things we enact help, and the results are good!
Monday, December 17, 2012
He has Asperger's, too...
So, its Monday. Not really any other..."oh gross its Monday." Monday's, either. It is the Monday after one of the WORST weekends my country has ever had. Children were brutally slain, by a young man...for unknown reasons. Young ones, their teachers, their Principal...their protectors in school. Slain for unknown reasons.
In the quest to FIND reasons in really what I feel is an utterly UNreasonable situation, America is dissecting the gunman. His family, his life, his conditions, his upbringing, his experiences. That is what we do. Some people make careers out of it...profilers I think they're called. The rest of us "amateurs" just want to understand, as tho IF we understood...it would change anything. Make us feel safer. Make this make "sense". Um, no.
Now, the "A" word is starting to make the rounds in the media, and likely as a result, at water coolers around the Nation this Monday of all Mondays. "Autism" "Asperger's"...the kid had it, didn't he? Some talking head said so, some law officer or DA or investigator or some "official" at the scene. The A word must be part of this puzzle...or indeed that one last piece that was hiding under the sofa cushion driving you insane because you cannot complete your picture without it.
I can hear it now, first probably just whispers "Well you know my friend has a nephew that has IT...and my friend said the kid is kinda, you know...quiet and strange." Maybe there's a nod and sidelong glance to see if anyone is dissenting or worried about the tone of the convo. If there isn't, it might get more interesting mightn't it? More JUICY. "Well I don't like to say it, but I heard a lot of kids with Autism are aggressive as hell. They'll slap you or punch you if you so much as make eye contact. That is why they don't look at you. That is how you can tell someone has it...I mean besides all the other weird stuff they do. Some of them are darned smart tho, and that makes them even scarier if you ask me." So it will go on and things will descend in a more and more sordid account of what the A word is, how people with IT, act and what their futures are likely to be.
Well, now! Ain't we a tolerant society, quick to embrace our fellow man...even if he is different. Um, No. No, we're not. I think the past elections made that ABUNDANTLY clear don't you? I think the already existent lines and walls and borders we have drawn around groups of people based on things like politics, religion, sex, gender, mental acuity, ability to "pass for normal"...makes that pretty evident. So, now people with Autism...anywhere along its vast and varied spectrum. are to be lumped in with a man who kills children. How...very "American" of us!
I have a son on the spectrum. He is 9 now. He was diagnosed with Asperger's and ADHD as a 1st Grader, outside diagnosis that we paid for when he kept having issues with impulse control and sitting still in class...and was receiving almost daily bad marks in his communicator as a result. It was a lengthy, tiring process that I won't go into here, tho it is detailed elsewhere in my blog. Needless to say the result was just as I wrote, I have a son on the Autism Spectrum.
He is in 3rd Grade now, having done 1st twice, and just this year his social and academic limitations have gotten him the official A word on his school treatment plan. That took time to get...they do not hand the A word out like candy on Halloween. For many reasons...one likely being that as we begin to see now, once it is "out" that you have the A word, boy are you hanging yer butt out there to be kicked. Not just by the system or your peers...but apparently by the media and the water-cooler and social media crowd as well. FUN!
I wanted to share my son with you guys...in pictures. Because I want you folks to understand that Autism is a Spectrum...and the children and teens and young adults on it, are as varied as snowflakes. No, they do not all have amazing genius hiding under strangeness. Some are just average, some well below. No, they do not all grunt instead of speaking or use fancy flowery language at age 5. No they do not all have no concept of humor or never smile. No, they do not all rock back and forth or scratch themselves or pull their own hair when stressed or to calm. They all have SOME things in common and just as many unique to them. Just like non spectrum people a room full of A word folks can have infinite combinations of personality traits, some exaggerated to the point of caricature, others so subtle you'd have to be TOLD they were there.
This is my son, on Monday...today. He is not wanting to get up for school.
Ah! I have managed to get him up, mostly. LOL! He always gets up, goes to the restroom, then brushes his teeth...while I lay out his clothes. Then he returns to dress and I put on his socks for him. We do it, just this way...every single morning. He likes routine...but so do a lot of us. ESPECIALLY, first thing in the morning.
See...we made it to the breakfast table! Here he is taking his Concerta before school. It helps him concentrate and control his need to constantly be in motion. He knows what they are, how they help, and as you can see...he is a morning person...once you get him out of bed! Some A Word people can, and do...smile and show happiness and be silly too....because they are all individuals. What do you take before work? Coffee? Aspirin? Xanax? ;)
This is my son waiting to leave for school. He is watching Youtube videos. Videos of a man who works at a car dealership and makes video tours of every car they get in stock. My son loves these and they are the only thing he watches on Youtube. Violence, even of a cartoon nature...scares him. Until he turned 8, his favorite shows were Dora and Diego and Spongebob. He still loves the sponge...but who doesn't? :) Yes, some A Word people have special interests they indulge in to decompress. They tend to talk a lot about them and have a hard time with subject change. But in our house special interest time is structured, limited and we encourage always...participation in family chats and activities.
This is my son at a street festival we go to every year. He remembers this statue and likes to sit next to him and mug and make faces for my camera...every year. Some A Word folks...have a decent grasp on humor and can alter their facial expressions to suit that grasp. My son likes jokes, even if the more subtle one's go over his head. He can tell when I laugh at something he does it means I am happy and he likes to see me, and others happy.
This is my son with a 3 week old puppy. We raised Beagles for several years here. His gentleness with the fragile puppies was admirable...considering, A Word or no...he is still a young boy. They taught him that ALL living things can feel, be hurt, and give and receive affection if it is properly given.
This is my son with HIS Beagle. He chose her himself...and they are very happy together. He feeds her every day as part of a chore list he is responsible for. He bestows love and affection on her, often...and whenever she is in trouble with me (as Beagles often are actually lol.) she runs to him to shelter her.
This is my son with his sister...on vacation in DC. He spent a 10 day stretch with us, a long road trip...daily adventures with tons of walking and novel sounds and experiences. He rode the Metro with aplomb and soaked in the atmosphere and sweltered in the heat. He went in to art galleries and museums and behaved properly. Some A Word folks, are more than capable of managing new scenarios and experiences without meltdowns and yelling or tantrums...IF their support team/family knows how to manage and present things. There is no reason for A Word folks to have to be isolated or not experience the same things any other person would...it just has to be presented differently, and the WORLD, needs to allow that.
This is my son, loving on me. Some A Word people are VERY capable of expressing unprompted affection. If they feel safe, if they feel it will be accepted. They experiment and test it out, to see that it is not scary...that it will not be pressed upon them or that they will be ordered to give it. Affection from A Word people is a true honor because it is never faked, for politeness sake, or merely out of habit. It is real and heartfelt and it means you are very special and safe for them.
This is my son, playing car with his Daddy. Some A Word people are very capable of some form of imaginary play. Especially centered around their special interests. Note the Frisbee wheel? lol...
This is my son, wearing feathers on Thanksgiving. He helped us do the crafts and enjoyed it. Some A Word folks...enjoy being part of a safe group and doing things together. He and his sister are very close and he plays with her and trusts her not to ask too much of him.
Don't mistake any of the above for an attempt to say my son is "normal". He is not...not that any outside person would accept as such. He hums, makes beeping car noises to himself. He wrings his hands and leans side to side. He darts glances or looks past your shoulder instead of into your eyes, he touches novel flooring and interrogates rather than has conversations. He doesn't give a rip about other children or people unless they come into his space and present themselves properly. He has no idea WHAT to say when unknown people ask him to play or his opinion...unless he is given a script to follow. He has Asperger's...he IS Asperger's. But, he is also a snowflake...different from likely anyone else on Earth...like we ALL are. He does not deserve to be mentioned in the same breath with a killer, or dissected by water cooler talk, he is what he is. A loved member of a dedicated family that bears ultimate responsibility for the man he will some day become...and we understand that. Just as I hope that EVERY parent out there, understands that. Thanks for reading...and please do feel free to share this post.
In the quest to FIND reasons in really what I feel is an utterly UNreasonable situation, America is dissecting the gunman. His family, his life, his conditions, his upbringing, his experiences. That is what we do. Some people make careers out of it...profilers I think they're called. The rest of us "amateurs" just want to understand, as tho IF we understood...it would change anything. Make us feel safer. Make this make "sense". Um, no.
Now, the "A" word is starting to make the rounds in the media, and likely as a result, at water coolers around the Nation this Monday of all Mondays. "Autism" "Asperger's"...the kid had it, didn't he? Some talking head said so, some law officer or DA or investigator or some "official" at the scene. The A word must be part of this puzzle...or indeed that one last piece that was hiding under the sofa cushion driving you insane because you cannot complete your picture without it.
I can hear it now, first probably just whispers "Well you know my friend has a nephew that has IT...and my friend said the kid is kinda, you know...quiet and strange." Maybe there's a nod and sidelong glance to see if anyone is dissenting or worried about the tone of the convo. If there isn't, it might get more interesting mightn't it? More JUICY. "Well I don't like to say it, but I heard a lot of kids with Autism are aggressive as hell. They'll slap you or punch you if you so much as make eye contact. That is why they don't look at you. That is how you can tell someone has it...I mean besides all the other weird stuff they do. Some of them are darned smart tho, and that makes them even scarier if you ask me." So it will go on and things will descend in a more and more sordid account of what the A word is, how people with IT, act and what their futures are likely to be.
Well, now! Ain't we a tolerant society, quick to embrace our fellow man...even if he is different. Um, No. No, we're not. I think the past elections made that ABUNDANTLY clear don't you? I think the already existent lines and walls and borders we have drawn around groups of people based on things like politics, religion, sex, gender, mental acuity, ability to "pass for normal"...makes that pretty evident. So, now people with Autism...anywhere along its vast and varied spectrum. are to be lumped in with a man who kills children. How...very "American" of us!
I have a son on the spectrum. He is 9 now. He was diagnosed with Asperger's and ADHD as a 1st Grader, outside diagnosis that we paid for when he kept having issues with impulse control and sitting still in class...and was receiving almost daily bad marks in his communicator as a result. It was a lengthy, tiring process that I won't go into here, tho it is detailed elsewhere in my blog. Needless to say the result was just as I wrote, I have a son on the Autism Spectrum.
He is in 3rd Grade now, having done 1st twice, and just this year his social and academic limitations have gotten him the official A word on his school treatment plan. That took time to get...they do not hand the A word out like candy on Halloween. For many reasons...one likely being that as we begin to see now, once it is "out" that you have the A word, boy are you hanging yer butt out there to be kicked. Not just by the system or your peers...but apparently by the media and the water-cooler and social media crowd as well. FUN!
I wanted to share my son with you guys...in pictures. Because I want you folks to understand that Autism is a Spectrum...and the children and teens and young adults on it, are as varied as snowflakes. No, they do not all have amazing genius hiding under strangeness. Some are just average, some well below. No, they do not all grunt instead of speaking or use fancy flowery language at age 5. No they do not all have no concept of humor or never smile. No, they do not all rock back and forth or scratch themselves or pull their own hair when stressed or to calm. They all have SOME things in common and just as many unique to them. Just like non spectrum people a room full of A word folks can have infinite combinations of personality traits, some exaggerated to the point of caricature, others so subtle you'd have to be TOLD they were there.
This is my son, on Monday...today. He is not wanting to get up for school.
Ah! I have managed to get him up, mostly. LOL! He always gets up, goes to the restroom, then brushes his teeth...while I lay out his clothes. Then he returns to dress and I put on his socks for him. We do it, just this way...every single morning. He likes routine...but so do a lot of us. ESPECIALLY, first thing in the morning.
See...we made it to the breakfast table! Here he is taking his Concerta before school. It helps him concentrate and control his need to constantly be in motion. He knows what they are, how they help, and as you can see...he is a morning person...once you get him out of bed! Some A Word people can, and do...smile and show happiness and be silly too....because they are all individuals. What do you take before work? Coffee? Aspirin? Xanax? ;)
This is my son waiting to leave for school. He is watching Youtube videos. Videos of a man who works at a car dealership and makes video tours of every car they get in stock. My son loves these and they are the only thing he watches on Youtube. Violence, even of a cartoon nature...scares him. Until he turned 8, his favorite shows were Dora and Diego and Spongebob. He still loves the sponge...but who doesn't? :) Yes, some A Word people have special interests they indulge in to decompress. They tend to talk a lot about them and have a hard time with subject change. But in our house special interest time is structured, limited and we encourage always...participation in family chats and activities.
This is my son at a street festival we go to every year. He remembers this statue and likes to sit next to him and mug and make faces for my camera...every year. Some A Word folks...have a decent grasp on humor and can alter their facial expressions to suit that grasp. My son likes jokes, even if the more subtle one's go over his head. He can tell when I laugh at something he does it means I am happy and he likes to see me, and others happy.
This is my son with a 3 week old puppy. We raised Beagles for several years here. His gentleness with the fragile puppies was admirable...considering, A Word or no...he is still a young boy. They taught him that ALL living things can feel, be hurt, and give and receive affection if it is properly given.
This is my son with HIS Beagle. He chose her himself...and they are very happy together. He feeds her every day as part of a chore list he is responsible for. He bestows love and affection on her, often...and whenever she is in trouble with me (as Beagles often are actually lol.) she runs to him to shelter her.
This is my son with his sister...on vacation in DC. He spent a 10 day stretch with us, a long road trip...daily adventures with tons of walking and novel sounds and experiences. He rode the Metro with aplomb and soaked in the atmosphere and sweltered in the heat. He went in to art galleries and museums and behaved properly. Some A Word folks, are more than capable of managing new scenarios and experiences without meltdowns and yelling or tantrums...IF their support team/family knows how to manage and present things. There is no reason for A Word folks to have to be isolated or not experience the same things any other person would...it just has to be presented differently, and the WORLD, needs to allow that.
This is my son, wearing feathers on Thanksgiving. He helped us do the crafts and enjoyed it. Some A Word folks...enjoy being part of a safe group and doing things together. He and his sister are very close and he plays with her and trusts her not to ask too much of him.
Don't mistake any of the above for an attempt to say my son is "normal". He is not...not that any outside person would accept as such. He hums, makes beeping car noises to himself. He wrings his hands and leans side to side. He darts glances or looks past your shoulder instead of into your eyes, he touches novel flooring and interrogates rather than has conversations. He doesn't give a rip about other children or people unless they come into his space and present themselves properly. He has no idea WHAT to say when unknown people ask him to play or his opinion...unless he is given a script to follow. He has Asperger's...he IS Asperger's. But, he is also a snowflake...different from likely anyone else on Earth...like we ALL are. He does not deserve to be mentioned in the same breath with a killer, or dissected by water cooler talk, he is what he is. A loved member of a dedicated family that bears ultimate responsibility for the man he will some day become...and we understand that. Just as I hope that EVERY parent out there, understands that. Thanks for reading...and please do feel free to share this post.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
The 2012 ARD Meeting
Well it was today! I had the usual butterflies going in. I know what to expect but still...going into this sort of meeting where you are not sure what's going to be said or etc can be a bit nerve wracking. My husband was able to come this time so that makes it that much easier. He's only missed one, and that was unavoidable.
For those unfamiliar, an ARD is an annual meeting REQUIRED by public schools for any child that has an IEP (basically a special learning plan designed for them due to some academic challenge or medical challenge). You go over the goals set last year, pick some for this year and next, and address any and all concerns over the child any side has. It is typically a parent, a diagnostician...any special ed teachers the child sees, the child's regular teacher, and Admin from the school. In our case, the Principal.
For all that they are a nervous time I also acknowledge that it is a pretty big deal to get to sit down once a year (or more if a parent calls for it) with all these people...in the same room, and discuss ONLY your child. That is huge and I honestly wish ALL parents could do this at LEAST once a year. I know it's pretty much impossible but still. Being able to raise a concern and have the Principal and every adult responsible for your child on a given school day...right there in front of you to discuss and talk with, is really something. They cannot hide from you, give you the run around...ignore you...foist you off etc. Not that all schools or school personnel do that...BUT..
So anyways it seems like our boy is doing about as well as he should be now. He is struggling with out of the box concepts in math and reading/writing...as to be expected with a person with Asperger's really. Speaking of that? I had in my head going in, asking for a re evaluation on him for that very thing. Right now his IEP is ONLY addressing issues with his ADHD, as he was found NOT to meet the criterion for a SCHOOL Asperger's dx last time in Kindergarten. I was wanting to re-visit that because I am seeing more of an effect of being Aspie as relates to schoolwork and such...
Turns out the wonderful Diagnostician at the school brought that up even BEFORE I had a chance! She was very frank in saying she see's more NOW than then...when he was younger and see's some of the social and academic deficits he has NOT narrowing in the way they would if he was just a "late bloomer", and so she herself suggested we try again for the dx of Asperger's. BUT, and here is where she differed from me...she wants to delay the re-assessment until next year as opposed to doing it now.
Her reasoning was...sure right now he MIGHT pass because he DOES have some deficits...BUT if we wait a year, when he is in 3rd Grade and doing 3rd/4th grade work...those deficits will be MUCH easier to spot, harder to ignore and she WANTS him to get a "yes" this time from the Board because she thinks he can benefit from it and needs some services that would afford him. I had to think about it for a bit because my first instinct is to get him re-assessed NOW. But in the end the important thing is to GET THE DIAGNOSIS put onto his file because then it STAYS and goes with him as he moves along. If we try again, and get another "no"...well that wouldn't be so good. And bottom line right now he could not be picked out in his current class by much else from his poor writing as "special needs"...and therein is the worry about testing now. He is an average student doing average work, and struggling in some things the way other kids are.
So the decision was ours at that point and given how much his teacher is doing already and plans to maintain and ADD to this year, we agreed to wait. The assessment itself involves time out of the class and he is holding his own right now and we just don't want to mess with it or make him worry etc right now and throw that all off.
BTW his teacher is just in love with him, you could tell thru the whole thing. She talked about his little idiosyncrasies and such with such candor and amusement and tenderness that we could tell that. She is doing A LOT in the course of the day to make his experience in the classroom better, and she is using his resource time well. That made me much more comfortable waiting. One cannot stress enough the importance of a teacher willing to accept a difference and learn to work with it and most importantly not look on it as a dreaded, mandated duty or "ugh", but as something she wants to do to help a student she genuinely would like to see succeed. I am so grateful to her :)
I also am going to share that the work I did with my therapist was in force here too. I felt so different leading up to it. Butterflies and nerves but not that loin-girding...battle axe rattling momma Grizzly like RAWR facade over myself. It's hard to describe but before I did that work I felt almost like I put on a different person over the real me because the real me wasn't strong enough or assertive enough. Today I felt like it was just me...and momma bear was still there but she was behind me (just in case I needed her but it would be MY call to make), and we were working together. I hope that doesn't sound to nuts but if it does...consider the source. LMAO!
Anyways. I am happy with how things went, grateful to not be alone in this, my husband and family and my friends are all so helpful and supportive of us. I thank them each and every one!
For those unfamiliar, an ARD is an annual meeting REQUIRED by public schools for any child that has an IEP (basically a special learning plan designed for them due to some academic challenge or medical challenge). You go over the goals set last year, pick some for this year and next, and address any and all concerns over the child any side has. It is typically a parent, a diagnostician...any special ed teachers the child sees, the child's regular teacher, and Admin from the school. In our case, the Principal.
For all that they are a nervous time I also acknowledge that it is a pretty big deal to get to sit down once a year (or more if a parent calls for it) with all these people...in the same room, and discuss ONLY your child. That is huge and I honestly wish ALL parents could do this at LEAST once a year. I know it's pretty much impossible but still. Being able to raise a concern and have the Principal and every adult responsible for your child on a given school day...right there in front of you to discuss and talk with, is really something. They cannot hide from you, give you the run around...ignore you...foist you off etc. Not that all schools or school personnel do that...BUT..
So anyways it seems like our boy is doing about as well as he should be now. He is struggling with out of the box concepts in math and reading/writing...as to be expected with a person with Asperger's really. Speaking of that? I had in my head going in, asking for a re evaluation on him for that very thing. Right now his IEP is ONLY addressing issues with his ADHD, as he was found NOT to meet the criterion for a SCHOOL Asperger's dx last time in Kindergarten. I was wanting to re-visit that because I am seeing more of an effect of being Aspie as relates to schoolwork and such...
Turns out the wonderful Diagnostician at the school brought that up even BEFORE I had a chance! She was very frank in saying she see's more NOW than then...when he was younger and see's some of the social and academic deficits he has NOT narrowing in the way they would if he was just a "late bloomer", and so she herself suggested we try again for the dx of Asperger's. BUT, and here is where she differed from me...she wants to delay the re-assessment until next year as opposed to doing it now.
Her reasoning was...sure right now he MIGHT pass because he DOES have some deficits...BUT if we wait a year, when he is in 3rd Grade and doing 3rd/4th grade work...those deficits will be MUCH easier to spot, harder to ignore and she WANTS him to get a "yes" this time from the Board because she thinks he can benefit from it and needs some services that would afford him. I had to think about it for a bit because my first instinct is to get him re-assessed NOW. But in the end the important thing is to GET THE DIAGNOSIS put onto his file because then it STAYS and goes with him as he moves along. If we try again, and get another "no"...well that wouldn't be so good. And bottom line right now he could not be picked out in his current class by much else from his poor writing as "special needs"...and therein is the worry about testing now. He is an average student doing average work, and struggling in some things the way other kids are.
So the decision was ours at that point and given how much his teacher is doing already and plans to maintain and ADD to this year, we agreed to wait. The assessment itself involves time out of the class and he is holding his own right now and we just don't want to mess with it or make him worry etc right now and throw that all off.
BTW his teacher is just in love with him, you could tell thru the whole thing. She talked about his little idiosyncrasies and such with such candor and amusement and tenderness that we could tell that. She is doing A LOT in the course of the day to make his experience in the classroom better, and she is using his resource time well. That made me much more comfortable waiting. One cannot stress enough the importance of a teacher willing to accept a difference and learn to work with it and most importantly not look on it as a dreaded, mandated duty or "ugh", but as something she wants to do to help a student she genuinely would like to see succeed. I am so grateful to her :)
I also am going to share that the work I did with my therapist was in force here too. I felt so different leading up to it. Butterflies and nerves but not that loin-girding...battle axe rattling momma Grizzly like RAWR facade over myself. It's hard to describe but before I did that work I felt almost like I put on a different person over the real me because the real me wasn't strong enough or assertive enough. Today I felt like it was just me...and momma bear was still there but she was behind me (just in case I needed her but it would be MY call to make), and we were working together. I hope that doesn't sound to nuts but if it does...consider the source. LMAO!
Anyways. I am happy with how things went, grateful to not be alone in this, my husband and family and my friends are all so helpful and supportive of us. I thank them each and every one!
Friday, January 6, 2012
Into 2012 we go!
Christmas and New Year's passed remarkably well here at our place. I am making some headway in dealing with my "mommy issues" and so far we've had some successful attempts to spend time together without any drama. I am hopeful on that front. I did some work just after Christmas with my therapist that was tremendously helpful. Hoping to continue that later this month.
All the Christmas gear was stowed away within a couple days of the day passing. If I don't do it then it tends to linger on way past NYE lol!
On the kiddo front, Elias's ARD meeting is next week and I am just a BIT jumpy/antsy about it. I am really torn between wanting them to RE-evaluate him for Autism and what it would mean if they did and found he was. Right now his IEP is only addressing his ADHD issues and honestly I think his Aspie stuff is more what's holding him back this year, the retention...openness to new concepts...and fine motor is just not there. I am hoping that the meeting yields a consensus on these items so we can formulate a new plan for him. So that's been giving me a couple of sleepless nights. He is doing WELL, but is still IMO behind where he should be and right now he just doesn't seem like a "3rd Grader" even with several months left. Fingers crossed.
Lily and Eli both tho, went back to school yesterday and both had a good day. Eli claims he doesn't want to go but he is truly, happier within all the structure and routine vs kinda vegetating her at home. The school's short week, tho mystifying seems to be a good "getting back into the swing of things" approach.
We are headed up north this weekend to "do Christmas" so that should hopefully be nice. At least there's always booze! LOL.
All the Christmas gear was stowed away within a couple days of the day passing. If I don't do it then it tends to linger on way past NYE lol!
On the kiddo front, Elias's ARD meeting is next week and I am just a BIT jumpy/antsy about it. I am really torn between wanting them to RE-evaluate him for Autism and what it would mean if they did and found he was. Right now his IEP is only addressing his ADHD issues and honestly I think his Aspie stuff is more what's holding him back this year, the retention...openness to new concepts...and fine motor is just not there. I am hoping that the meeting yields a consensus on these items so we can formulate a new plan for him. So that's been giving me a couple of sleepless nights. He is doing WELL, but is still IMO behind where he should be and right now he just doesn't seem like a "3rd Grader" even with several months left. Fingers crossed.
Lily and Eli both tho, went back to school yesterday and both had a good day. Eli claims he doesn't want to go but he is truly, happier within all the structure and routine vs kinda vegetating her at home. The school's short week, tho mystifying seems to be a good "getting back into the swing of things" approach.
We are headed up north this weekend to "do Christmas" so that should hopefully be nice. At least there's always booze! LOL.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Come on baby, light my Fire
Kindle Fire that is. After a mostly impatient wait...I have one. I am in the main pleased with it. Hard to find something else that costs $200 that is as happy making these days. I'll kinda give you my first impressions here.
I have had it for all of two days so...grain of salt yes?
First...out of the box impression? It's big...but also, small. It was big enough that I notice it because I typically have my iPhone attached to my hand. It is, obviously...bigger than my iPhone. It is also small. Smaller than my netbook...and my reading Kindle (an ancient but still awesome gen 1)...and of course, smaller than an iPad. I've never held an iPad...but this little Fire has a bit of heft. A solid feel vs a hefty one. Just enough that I knew I'd want a case almost immediately to give me a way to distribute that heft a bit and balance it. It was nice in feel...sleek and nothing portruding or glaringly ugly. The rubberized stuff on the back imprinted with KINDLE, is pretty snazzy. The glass display looked shiny and sleek too.
I found the wee button and pressed it and she awoke. I admit to being extremely giddy at this point. I plugged in the AC and d/l the software update that was present. The Fire came with no instructions really aside from plug her in and turn her on, and honestly? If you are used to either Apple products or Kindles you don't really need a "book" here...just your brain and your fingers! She woke up completely after the post d/l restart and we were ready to rock n roll.
After connecting her to the house wi-fi (no 3g here folks, so hotspots and house wi-fi are your choices unless you want to buy something else)...I poked around the home screen and found the on board manual, which I mainly ignored in favor of self guided exploration. I am SUCH a maverick! I figured out most of it inside an hour...but the web experience took longer.
The web browser...is different. I will say that. But it is FAST...faster than my netbook by a BIG margin. The cloud seems to indeed, hasten things up online. The keyboard is rather a interesting conundrum. It's big enough where thumbs are not gonna cut it. It's small enough that two hands are probably too much. I have been hunt n pecking a lot, and I've yet to find a truly comfortable way to use it. I have a feeling this will take some run in time on my part.
The movie streaming experience on Netflix at least was smooth. The more devices in your home using it at the same time tho, the crappier the picture. This is not a Kindle issue, but a bandwith issue. Once we had just the Kindle running a movie...it was sharp, clear, and beautiful. I have no quibble with the display...it's lovely. The sound on high...is not very loud...BUT, most of us use headphones of some type when listening to music or watching streaming content online I think? It's hardly a medium for crowds to gather around and share. But for what it is...the sound is nice.
Reading...what's it like to read on a FIRE? Depend on where you are, and what you're reading. I knew going in that a backlit display was NOT my preference for long term reads. Articles, comics, magazines etc? GREAT experience. Most format nicely and the page turning is seamless. Books? I will always prefer e-ink for that. There is a rather hardcore glare on the screen in ANY type of outdoor setting. I would wager this is par for the course using anything with glass up front. I am going to look into anti glare coatings/coverings. If there are none out now...there will be soon almost for sure.
Oh! Battery life seems pretty darned good too...especially considering it uses wi-fi and the amount of streaming content we've had going. 7-8 hours straight takes it down quite a bit...BUT...that's MUCH better than my iPhone gets truth be told!
Gaming? Angry Birds and similar games run smooth and look fabulous. There is every now and again a bit of a brainfart on where your finger is. the touch response is not like iPhone...BUT I believe iPhone has the most sophisticated and above everyone else kind of finger sensitivity. I am used to such quick tapping that often my Fire doesn't even know I was there LOL! I have to get used to leaving my finger there perhaps a 1/4 second longer. I loaded up and played my kids Animal Jam flash based game just fine. The screen size can be an issue...bit to narrow lengthwise in landscape, and in portrait too. But the game played fine, not quite the way it does on the puter with the mouse....but MUCH improved of the painfully slow grinding progress of the netbook.
In short...if you will or will not like the Fire will depend VASTLY on what you are buying it to replace. Your reading Kindle? Your computer? Your super fast lightning quick 3g use anywhere laptop? Nah, probably wouldn't bother. There are better options. It's not going to replace your camera or phone obviously because it IS none of those. But if you, like me...bought a netbook when those were so "in' for gaming, checking email and websites from where ever you are at home or at a hotspot, watching streaming content on a bigger screen than your phone while not occupying the home TV set? then the Fire is probably a great buy at $199. the app store was a lot more fleshed out, than I thought it would be too...and hopefully Amazon will see to it that it continues to grow.
Kids, also...will love this. It is just enough tablet to sate their iPad frenzy...but it is cheap enough that you can give them one and not wince every time they shake it or halfway sorta drop it. Kids apps and books are amazing looking and there are lots of interactive storybooks on offer for FREE in the app store...others that cost a very little. I have had VERY little time with my Fire owing to my kids simply being fascinated with it. especially it's capacity for streaming content...it's like a tiny TV they can carry off to where ever they want to watch.
I am sure I've left stuff out...I always do when I try to organize my brain in ANY form or fashion ;) Feel free to drop a comment if you have a specific question and I'll do my best to give you my honest opinion! Love all! Kindle on!
I have had it for all of two days so...grain of salt yes?
First...out of the box impression? It's big...but also, small. It was big enough that I notice it because I typically have my iPhone attached to my hand. It is, obviously...bigger than my iPhone. It is also small. Smaller than my netbook...and my reading Kindle (an ancient but still awesome gen 1)...and of course, smaller than an iPad. I've never held an iPad...but this little Fire has a bit of heft. A solid feel vs a hefty one. Just enough that I knew I'd want a case almost immediately to give me a way to distribute that heft a bit and balance it. It was nice in feel...sleek and nothing portruding or glaringly ugly. The rubberized stuff on the back imprinted with KINDLE, is pretty snazzy. The glass display looked shiny and sleek too.
I found the wee button and pressed it and she awoke. I admit to being extremely giddy at this point. I plugged in the AC and d/l the software update that was present. The Fire came with no instructions really aside from plug her in and turn her on, and honestly? If you are used to either Apple products or Kindles you don't really need a "book" here...just your brain and your fingers! She woke up completely after the post d/l restart and we were ready to rock n roll.
After connecting her to the house wi-fi (no 3g here folks, so hotspots and house wi-fi are your choices unless you want to buy something else)...I poked around the home screen and found the on board manual, which I mainly ignored in favor of self guided exploration. I am SUCH a maverick! I figured out most of it inside an hour...but the web experience took longer.
The web browser...is different. I will say that. But it is FAST...faster than my netbook by a BIG margin. The cloud seems to indeed, hasten things up online. The keyboard is rather a interesting conundrum. It's big enough where thumbs are not gonna cut it. It's small enough that two hands are probably too much. I have been hunt n pecking a lot, and I've yet to find a truly comfortable way to use it. I have a feeling this will take some run in time on my part.
The movie streaming experience on Netflix at least was smooth. The more devices in your home using it at the same time tho, the crappier the picture. This is not a Kindle issue, but a bandwith issue. Once we had just the Kindle running a movie...it was sharp, clear, and beautiful. I have no quibble with the display...it's lovely. The sound on high...is not very loud...BUT, most of us use headphones of some type when listening to music or watching streaming content online I think? It's hardly a medium for crowds to gather around and share. But for what it is...the sound is nice.
Reading...what's it like to read on a FIRE? Depend on where you are, and what you're reading. I knew going in that a backlit display was NOT my preference for long term reads. Articles, comics, magazines etc? GREAT experience. Most format nicely and the page turning is seamless. Books? I will always prefer e-ink for that. There is a rather hardcore glare on the screen in ANY type of outdoor setting. I would wager this is par for the course using anything with glass up front. I am going to look into anti glare coatings/coverings. If there are none out now...there will be soon almost for sure.
Oh! Battery life seems pretty darned good too...especially considering it uses wi-fi and the amount of streaming content we've had going. 7-8 hours straight takes it down quite a bit...BUT...that's MUCH better than my iPhone gets truth be told!
Gaming? Angry Birds and similar games run smooth and look fabulous. There is every now and again a bit of a brainfart on where your finger is. the touch response is not like iPhone...BUT I believe iPhone has the most sophisticated and above everyone else kind of finger sensitivity. I am used to such quick tapping that often my Fire doesn't even know I was there LOL! I have to get used to leaving my finger there perhaps a 1/4 second longer. I loaded up and played my kids Animal Jam flash based game just fine. The screen size can be an issue...bit to narrow lengthwise in landscape, and in portrait too. But the game played fine, not quite the way it does on the puter with the mouse....but MUCH improved of the painfully slow grinding progress of the netbook.
In short...if you will or will not like the Fire will depend VASTLY on what you are buying it to replace. Your reading Kindle? Your computer? Your super fast lightning quick 3g use anywhere laptop? Nah, probably wouldn't bother. There are better options. It's not going to replace your camera or phone obviously because it IS none of those. But if you, like me...bought a netbook when those were so "in' for gaming, checking email and websites from where ever you are at home or at a hotspot, watching streaming content on a bigger screen than your phone while not occupying the home TV set? then the Fire is probably a great buy at $199. the app store was a lot more fleshed out, than I thought it would be too...and hopefully Amazon will see to it that it continues to grow.
Kids, also...will love this. It is just enough tablet to sate their iPad frenzy...but it is cheap enough that you can give them one and not wince every time they shake it or halfway sorta drop it. Kids apps and books are amazing looking and there are lots of interactive storybooks on offer for FREE in the app store...others that cost a very little. I have had VERY little time with my Fire owing to my kids simply being fascinated with it. especially it's capacity for streaming content...it's like a tiny TV they can carry off to where ever they want to watch.
I am sure I've left stuff out...I always do when I try to organize my brain in ANY form or fashion ;) Feel free to drop a comment if you have a specific question and I'll do my best to give you my honest opinion! Love all! Kindle on!
Wednesday, April 21, 2010
Retaining, rethinking
So it's that time of year, time to make a decision on where Elias will land next year. I know they are going to pass him out of 1st Grade but not 100% sure that will be okay with us.
Hubs and I have had many discussions on Eli and his status next year. We almost are ready to send him along to 2nd grade but the fact that his IEP and extra help plan ONLY got enacted about 2 months ago is holding us back.
He is making some real progress filling those gaps that were glaringly apparent when we all discussed the goals for his IEP...but I think about how much MORE they could have closed if only it'd been a FULL YEAR under the plan and I pause to consider. I think it would benefit him...and if we send him along it seems like tho his IEP would still be there, he'd now have the gaps remaining from THIS year...and adding IN the ones still to come because the cirriculum builds upon itself.
Lily's year has been all about that TAKS test and she looks ready to ace that thing...but I honestlly cannot see Eli being as comfortable or ready if we send him on now.
I called the Counselor today and she said she'd discuss it with She Who, and his Special Ed teachers to get their thoughts...and they'd call me back to discuss it. It's completely up to us but I would like to hear what they have to say since they know him from a "school" point of view likely more than I do.
Just want to get this right, make sure we give him every chance. I know retaining him now in 1st will carry a lot less stigma than him getting held due to that TAKS test in 3rd...where the kids are much older and quite a bit crueler from what Lily tells me. He relates better to younger kids anyways...and he will ONLY be turning 7 come August just before the 2nd Grade year starts...so he'd hardly be older if at all, than the kids entering 1st.
I think at this point, the best thing would be to give him that extra year NOW...as opposed to regretting not doing it. He will NOT be happy because he is already talking about 2nd Grade...not sure how I will handle that part of things, but I guess we will deal when it happens.
IN OTHER NEWS! My dearest husband dropped the news today that the Browns have a game in New Orleans right on our ANNIVERSARY WEEKEND! I mean how big a coinky-dink is that?? We must go...you simply do not ignore things like that LOL. I know they'll get CREAMED but it will still be fun...I am really looking forward to the trip. It was hard to pick between Las Vegas and Nawlins but I am really excited about headed to the Big Easy now.
The kittens are growing too fast! But that's how babies are..*sigh*
Enjoy your Wednesday, all!
Hubs and I have had many discussions on Eli and his status next year. We almost are ready to send him along to 2nd grade but the fact that his IEP and extra help plan ONLY got enacted about 2 months ago is holding us back.
He is making some real progress filling those gaps that were glaringly apparent when we all discussed the goals for his IEP...but I think about how much MORE they could have closed if only it'd been a FULL YEAR under the plan and I pause to consider. I think it would benefit him...and if we send him along it seems like tho his IEP would still be there, he'd now have the gaps remaining from THIS year...and adding IN the ones still to come because the cirriculum builds upon itself.
Lily's year has been all about that TAKS test and she looks ready to ace that thing...but I honestlly cannot see Eli being as comfortable or ready if we send him on now.
I called the Counselor today and she said she'd discuss it with She Who, and his Special Ed teachers to get their thoughts...and they'd call me back to discuss it. It's completely up to us but I would like to hear what they have to say since they know him from a "school" point of view likely more than I do.
Just want to get this right, make sure we give him every chance. I know retaining him now in 1st will carry a lot less stigma than him getting held due to that TAKS test in 3rd...where the kids are much older and quite a bit crueler from what Lily tells me. He relates better to younger kids anyways...and he will ONLY be turning 7 come August just before the 2nd Grade year starts...so he'd hardly be older if at all, than the kids entering 1st.
I think at this point, the best thing would be to give him that extra year NOW...as opposed to regretting not doing it. He will NOT be happy because he is already talking about 2nd Grade...not sure how I will handle that part of things, but I guess we will deal when it happens.
IN OTHER NEWS! My dearest husband dropped the news today that the Browns have a game in New Orleans right on our ANNIVERSARY WEEKEND! I mean how big a coinky-dink is that?? We must go...you simply do not ignore things like that LOL. I know they'll get CREAMED but it will still be fun...I am really looking forward to the trip. It was hard to pick between Las Vegas and Nawlins but I am really excited about headed to the Big Easy now.
The kittens are growing too fast! But that's how babies are..*sigh*
Enjoy your Wednesday, all!
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